480 ·, T11e ordinary burdens of a Marrieil ftate. ~ing tb•rtgbt for the future, what you !hall eat, and what you !hall drink, and wherewith !hall you and yours be cloathed > ~· 2 3. 3• Your wants in a married £late are far hardlier born than in a fingle £late• .It is far e;fier to be~r perfo>ul wants our fel~cs,tha.n to feethe wants of Wife and Children ! Affeetion will make their futfenngs pmch you ! And. '"i\enutty wdl make 1t a trouble to your mind, to need the help of fer– vants, and to w~nt tha.~ whtch ts. fit for fervants to expe6t: But efpecial~y the difcontent and impati· enc~ or your famtly, will rf!Ore dtfcontent you than all theu wants-. You cannot help your Wife, and Children_,. and Servants .t~ contented minds~ 0 what a heart·~utting tryal is it, to ht:ar them repining,' mu.rmurm_g_and compla1~tng ~ To hear them call ~or that whtch you have not tOr them; and grieve at the1r condttJOn,a~d exdaH\1 ofyou, Ot of the provtdenc;e of God, becaufe they have ir not? And think not that Riches will free you from thefc difcontcnts: For as the Rich are but ftw, fo they that h:2v~ tnttcb have much 10 do with it : A great foot muft have a great {boo: When poor men want fame [null JttpptyJ, Rich men may want gre.u fumr, or larger provifions, which the poor can ealtly be without. Aud their condition lifting them up to greater pride, doth torment them with greater d.ilcomems. 'ij.ow few in all the wOild that have families, are content with their eflates. 9· 24· 4· Hereupon a married life containeth far more temptations to 'lt'orldlinefs or cBvttottjiuji,than a finglc !late doth. For when you think you nudmore, you will defire more: And when you tind all too little cofatistie thofc thar you provide for, you will meafure your tjlate by their defirer, and be apt to think that you have never enough. Birds and Bea(ts that have young ones m provide for, are mofi hungry and rapacious. You have fO many now to fcrape for, that you will think you are fi:ill in wam: It is not only till DeatiJ tha.t yoq muf\ now lay up; but you mufi provide for cbildren that ju1vive you. And while you take them ro be as your {elves, you have t~o Generations now to make provilioos tOr; And moO men are as Covetous for their polleriry, as if it were forthemfclves. . . ~· 2 5• 5• And hereupon you are hindred from works of Charity to others: Wif< and Childrm are the devouring gulf that fwalloweth all. If you had but your folvtJ to provide for, a little would ferve: And you could deny JOUr own ddires of unncccffary things; and {o might have plentiful pro.. vilion for good works: But by that time Wife and Children arc provided for, and allthcir imporlllnatc defircs fatistied, there is nothing coniiderable left for pious or charitable ufes.: Lamentable experience prodaimeth this. 9· 26. ~· And hereby it appearcth how much a married (\ate doth ordinarily hinder men from ho· nouring their profeffion. It is their vows of fingle life that hath ocCJfioned the Papitls to do fo ma– ny worl<s of publick charity, a• is boafied of for the honour of their Se6l: : Fur when they have no Children to bequeath it to, and cannot keep it themfi.lves, it is eafie for them to Jeave it to fuch ufes as will pacific their Confcicnces mofi, and advance their names. And if it Chou\d prove M go1d tJ "orl{_ and •H acctpt:~bte to.(;od, to educate your own Children pioufly for his fervice, as eo relieve the children of the poor, yet is it not fo much regarded in lht: world, nor bringeth fo much honour to Religion. One hundred pound given to the poor·fhall more advance the repution of your liberal:ty and virtue, than a thoufand pound given to your o..vn children, though it be with as pious an end, to train them up for th.e fervice of the Church. And though this is inconfiderable as your own honour is concerned in it, y.et it is confiderable as the honour ofReligion, and the good of fouls is concerned in it. 9· 27· 7· And it is no finall patience which the namral imbecili•y ot the ftmale j(x rcquircth you to prcpaxe. Except it be very few that arc patient and manlike, women are commonly of pntcnt fantafiu, 3.nd tender paf!ionatc impatient fpirirs, eafily calt into anger, or jc:aloulie:, or difcontent : and of weak under Handing~, and therefore unable to reform them{Clvcs. They are betwixt a man and a child': Some few have more of the man, and many have more of the cbild; bnt man arc but in a mid-' die Hare. Weaknefs naturally indineth perfons robe frorvard and hr.~rd to pl£•a[e; as we fee in ehif.. dren, old people, and lick perfons: They are like a fore difiempered body: You can fcarcc_ touch them but you hurt them. With too many you can feme tell how to [peal(. or look but you d:fpleafe them. If )'OU fhould be very well verfi in the art of pleafhrg, and {Ct your [elves to it with all your care, as if you made it your very bufioefs and had little elfc to do, yet it would put you hard to it, tJ pleafe fame weak irnpatien~ pc~fons, if not quite fu~plf~ yo~1r ability and skill. .A1;d .the mar~ you love them the more grievous lt will be, to fee them ll:ll m difcontcnts, aweary at tne1r condition, and to hear the clamorous expreffions of their difquiet minds. N1y the very multitude of words that very many arc addicted to, cloth 1_nake Come mens lives a continu:~.l burden to them. Mar~ what the Scripture faith, Prov. 21· 9· It is better to dweU in a cormrofthe houfi top, than lPith abrawlmg woman in a rride lmiff. Verf. 19• It Uboter t J dn:eU in tbe wilderNc{s, tiJ.;~IJ n•itb a contcntiotu and a;t angry rroma;r. So 25. verf. 24• And 'Prov. 27· 15· A continual drnpping in a vcr)' rai11y da)', and a con– tentiozu lPtmun are aliJte. Ecdd. 7· zS. One man among a thozt[aud have I Juund: bz~l a womrm among all tiJo{e h.we I not found. . 9· 28. 8. And there is fuch a meeting (lf f.lUltJ and i~ptrfe[lio»l on b_otiJ fidel, that m~k~rh ~t much the harder to bear the intlrrnitics of others aright. It m:e p.1rty only \\•ere froward and 11npat1Ct~t, the Hedfaf\nefs of the other might make it the more tolerable; Bur we are all tick i11 fomc rn:alure_of the fame difeafe: And whenweakndS meeteth with weakncfs, and pride with pride, and. P.?.0 1011 wuh p.ifliOn, it ro<:afpeutcth the difcafe and doublcth the futfering. And onr corro~{ion tS {uch, that though onr intent be to lu:lp om: another in our d:~tieJ, yet we arc apter far tO tl1r up one anochcrs d~Hcmpcr~. 9· 29· 9· The hufi;rrf!, cafe and trouble of a married life, ~~ a ~,reat temptat ion, to ea~ down o.ur tbJu?.ht.r fr"m Gad, and to diven them from the one tbing lrccr.IJiry L'.lk. 10· 4:. ana to d·ftrJct. tllC ... mtnd,
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