Baxter - BJ1441 B3 1673

DireE'fions fur them tiJat are abotlt to Marry. the foul: Nay, if you abound not above others in good Works, the blind malicious world will fee no· thing that is good m you; but will fay~ You have guod word1, but wbete are YIP'' g?sd 'f!}orl<_r l Wlu t abundance have I known hardncd againfi rhe Gofpel and Religion, by a common fame , that tbefe Pre:zcberJ are aJ covetout, and worldly, and unch.Iri.table as any others: And it mull be fomcthing extra~ ordinary that ir.ufi confute fuch fame. And what abundance of fuccefs have I feen of the labours of rhofe Minifiers, wlio give all rhey have in works ofCharity? And though a rich and rifO/ved malt may do fome good in a married fi.atc, yet commonly it is 11txt to nothing, as ro the en'ds now rnenti– ()md : Wife, and Children, and Family-neceffities d(:vour all, if you have never fo much. And Come provition mufi be made for them when you are dead; And the maintenance of the Mioilhy is not {o great as to fuffice well for all this, much lefs for any cmioem works of Charity beiid.es ! Nt:ver reckon upon the doing of much good to the poor if you have Wives and Children of your own ! Such inllances are raritks and wooders. All will be too little for your felves. Ylhercas ifall tluc were given to the poor which goeth to the maimeuance of your families, you liule know how much it would ieconcile the minds of the ungodly, and further the fuccefs of your Minific:rial work. · §. 42· Din:Cl. 3· IfGud call you to a married life, rxpell all thefo troubltJ, or mo{l Gf them; and mak..,e a particular prep.zratiou for each 1emptation, Crnfi and Dmy which you muft txpe[i. Think not rhar yeu are enuing into a Hate of mecr delight ; lefi it prove but a fools Paradice to you. See that yoa be furnilhed with Marriagc-(lrmgth and patience, for rhc duties and fufferiugi of a marrieQ (hrc, before you venture on ir. Efp(:cially I· Be wdl provided againft Temptations to a W'orhlly mind and life : For here you arc like to be moll violently and dangeroufly alflUlted! 2· See that you be well provided with Conjugal t~JfeftionJ : For they arc necetfary both eo the Dutiu and Sufftringi of a married life : And you fhould not enter upon the ftate without the nece1fJry preparatiom. 3· See that you be well provided with Marriage-prudenee and und'trjlanding, that you may be able tO infiruCt and editie your families, and may live with them as men ot knowledge, 1 Pet. 3• 7· and may manage all your bu!ine!s with difcretion, Pfa/. I I2. I 5• 4• See that you be provided with Rif'lv· ednef! and Conftancy, that you vex not your felf and relations by too lace repemings; and come not off with a H:zd I wiji, or non putdram. Levity and mutability is no tit preparative for a fiate chat only death can change. Let the Love and Rcfolutions which brought you into that fiate, continue with you to the Jafi, 5· See that you be provided with a diligence anfwerable to the greatnefs of your undertaken duties. A Oothful mind is unfit for . one that entereth him[elf voluntary upon fo much bufindS; as acowardly mindisunfit for him that lifi:eth hirnfelf a Souldicr fortheW.ns. 6. Sec that you are well provided with Marriage-patience ; to bear with the infifmities ofOthers, and undergo the daily croffcs of your life, which your bufinefs, and mceffitiet, and your own infirmities will unavoidably infer. To Marry without all this preparation, is as fooli(h. as to go to Sea with· out the necdTary preparations for your Voyage, or to go to War without Armor or Ammunition, or to go to work without Tools or Strength, or to go to buy Meat in the Muket when·you have no money. ~· 43• Direct. 4• Tak! fpeci:zl care th.Jt fanfie and paffion over·rule not Reafo'Jh andFriendJ adl!icc, in tbe choice of yottr condition, or of the perfou. I know you mufi have Love to thofe that you m,nch with ; But that Love rnufi be Ratio11al, and fuch as you can juitifie in the fcverefi rryal, by the evi.. dencc:s of tl'orth and fitHefs in the perfon whom you love. To fay you Lave, but you ~now not why, is more bcfeeming children or mad folks, than thofc that are foberly entring upon a change of life of fo great importance to them. AhlindLove which makcth you think a perfon excellent and ami· able; whe in the eyes of the wifefi that arc impartial, is nothing fo, or malfeth you overvalue the perfon whom you fanfic, and be fond of one as fame admirable creature, that in che eyes of others is next to contemptible, this is but the Index and evidence of your folly. And though you plcafe your felves in it, ;nd honour it with the name of Love, there is none that is acquainted with it, that will give it any better name than LUST or FANCY. And the mmiage that is made by Lujl and Fancy will never tend to folid Content or true Felicity; But either it will feed till death on thefewell that kindled it, and then go out in everlafiing Chame : or elfe more ordinarily it proveth but a blaze, and turneth into loathing and wearinefs of each other. And becaufe this pallion of Lrtjf (called Love ) is fuch a befotting blinding thing, (like the longing of a woman with child) it is the· duty of all rhat1feel any touch of it to kindle upon their hearts, to call it prefenrly to the tryal, and to quench it elfel:tually, and till that be done (if they have any relicts of wit or reafon) to fufpcet , their own apprehenfions, and much more to tru(l: the judgement and advice of orhers. ~· 44· The means to quench this Lujl called Love, I have largely opened before. 1 {hall now on1y Ho\• to rur.e remember you of thefc tew. I· Keepafundcr, and at a fufficient dithnce from the perfon rhar you Luftful Lov~. dote upon. The nearnefs of the fire and fewel caufeth the combufiion. FancJ' and Lujl are enflamed by thefcn[cJ. Keep out of fight, and in time the Feavor may abate. 2.0vervalt1e not v.miry : Think not highly of a Silken Coat, or of the great Names ofAnccfiors, or of Money, or Lands, or of a p1inted or a fpotted face, nor of that natural corhclinc:fs called beauty ; Judge not of thingsas children, but as mw; Play not the fools in magnifying trit\es, and overlooking inward real worrh. Would you fall in Love with•a Flower or Pi6turc at this rate? Bethink you what work the Pox, C?.r any other withering ficknefs will make with that filly beauty which you fo admire: Think what a fpeC\:a,le death will make it : Aad how many thoufands once more beautiful , arc turned now W commen earth. And how many thoufand fouls are now in Hell, that by a beautiful body were drowned in luft, and tempted to neglect thetnfelves ? and how few io the world you can name _ that.

RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy OTcyMjk=