. Dire[/. 4· DireU. 5· ~ainflDif· ~mion. ·~ For Conjugal deligl>t and Peace and J2!tietnef. appr1.1r.mct of it:, fuffer r.ot your rye or thougbt to go :iftcr aflr.mgrr, nor to begin a breach in your Covenant and conjugal fidelity. · 9.6. DireLt-4. HuJbandandwife mnjftakeDeli~ht intht L""' and Company and conve'[t of each otb~r. There is norhing that m.ws heart is ~o inordina_tcly fet up?n ~s Delight : And yet the lawful delJgbt allowt:d them by God, they can turn mto lo1thmg and d,fd~m. The deti;_,ht which would entangle you in fin, and nun you from your duty and from God, is it that is forbidden you : But this is a Delight that ishrlpful ro you in your duty, and would keep you from fin: When HuJband'and TYife take pleJfure in each orher, it unitcth them in duty, it helpeth them with ea(C to do their work . ;;m~ bear ~hcir -bur~cns; and is not the lea~ put ?f the comfort ofthe married ilate. Prov. 5 , x8, 19 : . Rruoyce wuh the wife of thy yozttfJ, as tbc lovmgHmd a11d pleafjnt Roe, let her breaft.r {atisfie thee at all time.r, and be thoit. ravijhtalwt~ys wi~hhcr love. T hcrero:re a Wife is called, The dcfire of the eyes: Ezek. 24· 16. Avmd therefore al\ thmgs that may n'pre'fcnt you unpleafant or unlovely to each other. And ute all lawful means to cheri{h complacency and delight ; not by foolifh ridiculous or proucl attire, orirnmodcfiatl:ions; but by clcamufs and decency and j.Jnddeportment. Nafiinefs and undean-~ nefs and unfecmly carriage, and foolilb fpcech, and whatever is loathfomc in body or mind, mull be lhunned as T emptations which would hinder you from that lOve and plearur~ and content, which Husband and Wife 010uld hJve in one a:-lOther. And yet it is a fooli!b. fle!b.ly perfon, that will conrinue Love no longer than it is cheri011.d with a11 this care. If there be any deformity of the bvdy, or any thing unfeemly in behaviour, or if God Chould vilit them with any loathfom fores or ficknefs, they muft for all that love each other, yea and t:lkc pleafute in their converfe: It is not a true hi.:nd that leaveth you in advcdity ; nor is it. true .conjuga.l affeCt:ion which is blafied by a loathfom ficknefs. The Love of Mothers to thm Chtldren wtll make them take pleafure in them notwithfb.nding their ficknefs or unclea.nnefs: And fo lliould theirLovedo between a Husband and his Wife. He that confidcreth that his own jltjh is lyable to the fame difeafes, and like ere long to be as IOJthlomc, will do as he would be done by, and not turn away· in time of her atliiction from her that is btcome his flclli. Much lefs cxcufable is the crime at them that when they h~ve no– thing LX;rJordinary to diltatle or difaffect them, are weary of thetompany of .one another, and hid rarhcr be in th 'ir Neighbours houfes than in their own, and find more pleafure in the company of a firangcr, rhan a!· one another. · . §,. 7· Din·tt 5· It it a great duty of Husbands and Wiutt to"live ih quietnefi and peace, and. avoid all occ.:tfiomofwrathanddifcord. B~caufe this is·a .duty of \o ·great importance, I Chall firft open to you che great nectj]ity ot ir, and then ·give you m~reparticular Direaions to perform it. 9· 8. I. It is a duty which your Vnio!t or nm relJti•H doth fpecially require. Will you fall out with your felve.r l cannot you agreeWith your ownflelb? 2• Your difcord will be your pain, and the vexation of your lives. Like a B1le or Wound or Fracture in your own bodies, which will pain you till ies cured; You will hardly keep Ptace in your mindJ, when Peace is broken fo near you in your family· As you would nke heed of hurting your felves, and as you would ~allen tbe Cure when you are llurt ; fo fhouid you take heed of any brc•ch of Peace, and quickly feek ~0 heal it when it's broken. 3· Diffention tends to cool your Love~ Oft falling out duth tend to leave a habit of dithfie and averlilefs on the mind. Wo~nding is feparating. And to be tyed together by any outward bonds, when your Hearts are feparated, is but to be tormented; and to have t~e infides of adverfaries, while you have·conjuga] putfl~s. As the difference between my houfe and 'm,y pri[nni5, that I willingly and with delight dwelljn the one, but am unwillingly confined to the other fuch ~ill be the difference between a quiet and an unquiet life, in your married Hate: It turneth you; dweUing and delight into a Prifon; where you are chained to thofe calamities, which in a free con· dition you might over-iun : 4• D iiTcntion between the Husband and the Wife, 'do difcrder aH their Family· affairs: They arc like Oxe:1 unequlliy yoaked, that can tid no work fo~ flriving with one another : Nothing is well done bccaufe of the variance of tho[e that lbou!d do it, or o\'erfeeit. 5· It exceedingly unfitteth you for the Worfhip of God: You are not lit to pray togethcr, ,nor to confer together of Heavenly tlungs, nor to be helpers to each others fouls : I need nor tell you this; fou feel it by experience. Wrath and birterndS will not allow you fo much. cxercife of love and holy compofednefs of mind, as every one of thefe duties do require. 6. Dilfeption dif.bleth y9u to govern your FamiJies aright. Your Children and Servants will take example by you ; or think~ they are at liberty to do what they !ill, when they find you taken up with fuch wmk between your fdves: And they will think you unfit to reprove them for their faults, when they fee you guilty of fuch faults and folly of your own: ljo.y you will become,the iliame and fecret derifion of your Family, and bring your (elves into cortfc"mpt. 7· Your Diftentions will p:pofe you -to the J!lalice of Satan, and give him advantage for manifold temptations: A houfe divided cannot. fiand-: An Army divided is eafily conquered, and m;tde a prey to the Enemy. You cannot forefee what abundance of fin you put your felves in danger of. By all this you may fee what Dilfefltions between Husband and Wife do tend to, a11d how they fhould be avoided. ' Di~c8:io~~ J 11. For the avoiding of them obferve thefe Sub-directions. I· Keep up yom conjugt.tl Love in " agalnfl Dllf:n· conftant beat.4nd vigottr· Love will fupprefs wrath : You cannot have a bitcer mind upon finall tJOn. ·provocations, againfi .thofe that you dearly love: much lefs can you proceed to reviling words or to aver!enefs and d\rangedncfs or any abufe of une another. Or if abreach and wound be unba)>pily made,
RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy OTcyMjk=