p6 'DireEiions to help eacl' otiJer to Sal1Jation. They that flight, or leath, or are weary of each other will difdain reproofs, and fcorn advice from one another ; When entire affe6tion greatly difpofer:h to the right entertainment of inJirud'ion. ., Sitbdirrt1.7· ~·~I· Direct. 7·. Difcouragt 1101 each other from injlr~llion or rtproof hy ~.skJng it iU, or by churlijh rrftelltonJ, or by obfi:nate unrrformcdnt{r. When you will not learn, or will not amend, you Cifcou~ rage your infbu6tcr and uprover. Men will be apt to &ive ovu, when they arc requited with in~ gratitude, a11d fnappiCh retortions, or when they perceive that their labour is all in vain. And as it is the heavidl judgement ofGod that befalleth any upon earth, when he vtithdraweth his advice and heJp~ and lcavtth finn~rs wholl)·_ro th~mfclVes ; fo it is the faddetl condition in your relations, when the 1gnorant an~ finnmg party IS foriaken by the ot~cr, and left to their own opinons and waycs : Though indeed Jt lhould not be fo, becaufc while there is life there is hope. Subdird/.8. ~· 22· Dired. 8. So far as you ore able to injlrull or quick.fn one anothu, call in for hmer betp 1 : Engage tach othtr 'tn the reading of the mojt cuitvincing quick..,'fing Book.}, and in attendance on th't mojf powerful Minijlry, and ill profitable converfe with the holieft per [on~> Not fo as to ncgled your du– ry to one another ever the more : but that all helps concurring may be the more effectual. When they find you fpeak to them, but the fame things whi<h Miniftcrs and other Chrillians fpeak, it will be the more eahly received. Subdirel1·9· ~. 23. Dircd.ll. Couccal n01 theftate of your f•uls, nor hidt not your faultt from one another. You arc as one flc(h, and fhould have one heart: And as it is moftdangerous for a man to be unknown to himfelf, fo is it very hurtful to Husband or Wife, w be unknown to one another , in thofe cafes wherein they have need of helpIt is foolilh tcndernefs of your felves, when you conceal your di– feafe from your Phyficion, or your helpful friend; And who lhould be fo tender of you, and helpful to y~u, as you fhould be to one another. Indeed in fome few cafes,where tht opening of a fault or fecret, w1ll but tend to quench affection, and not to get affiftance from another , it is wifdom to conceal it: But that is not the ordinary cafe. The opening your hearts to each other is necdfary to your mutual help. Snhdir. xo. §. 24· Dired'. 10• . Avoid as m11ch at may ~t coxtrariety of opini1ns in Religion : t'or if or.cc ymt be of ditferenr judgements in matters which you cake to be of great concernment, you will be l<mpted to difaffect, contemn or undervalue on.e another; and fo to de!pife the help which you might receive ; An~ if you fall into feveral Sects, and follow leveral Teachers, you will hardly avoid that contention and confufion, which will prove a great advantaic to the Devi1 1 and a great impediment to your fpiritual good. · Subtlir. 11· §. 2 5- Direct. 11· If diff.,ence in judgemw in mattert ofRtligion do faU oul htlwe<n yoH, befurt that it he managed with Holineji, Hllmility, Love and Pe11ct, and no1 with Car11ality, Pride, Vnchar.ita~ bfentfs or Conttntion. I· To manage your diflcrences Holily, is to take God for the Judge, and to I<fer -the matter to his Word, and to aim at his Glory, and the pleafing of his WiU, and to ufe his Means for th• Concord of your judgements ; which is, to fearch the Scripture, ·and confult with the faithful able Pafiors of the Church, and foberly and patiently to debate the cafe, and pray;toge– ther for the iJiurnination of the Spirit. On the contrary your Diffcrcntes arc carn•l/y managed, when earn•! reafo•tt bmd or feed them; and when you run after this or that Sect or Party, through ad– miration of the perfons, and value not the perfons for the fake of irHih, but meafure 'truth by the opi– nion and ellimate ofthe perfonr; and when you end your differences by felfi(h carnal principles and re– fpeets: And hence it comes to pafs, that if the H114band be a P.pift or otherwife erroneous, its two ro one that the l.Vife becometh of his erroneous Religim~, not becaufc of any togent evideHce, but becaufe he is of the llronger parts, and hath conllant opportunity to perfwade, and becaufe Lrn~e preparcth and inclineth her to be of his opinion; And thus Man inllead of God, is the maf\er of the faith of many. 2· Your differences are managed in H...,ility, when you have a jufiand modefi fufpicion of your own underfiandings, and debate and pradife your differences with rneeknefs and fubmilf10n ; and do not proudly overvalue all your own apprehenfions, and defpife anothers Reafons as if they were not worthy of your confideration. 3• Your differences mofi be fo far managed iri Love, not t\lat meer Love lhould make you turn to anothers opinion be it true or filfe, but that you rnull be very dtfirour to be of the fame mind, and if you cannot, mull take it for a fore affiichon, and mufi bear with the rolerable miO:akes of one another, as you bear with ym~r own infirmities; that they cool not Love, nor -alienate not your hearrs from one another, but only provoke you to a tender healing compaffionareCare, and endeavour to do each other good. 4• And you mull manage your differences,. in quietnefi, without any paffionate wranglings and dHT'entions, that no bitter frui~s may be bred by it in your families among your [elves, Thus aU true Chrillians, mu£1 manage the~r differences in matters of Religion; but married perfons above all. Subdir. 12• ~· 26. Direct. 12· Be noi eitberbli,.dly indulgentto each othersfaultt,noryettoo cen{orio111 oftach otherI ftatt, itJ.f Satan tbtreby get advantage io alit~te ytJur affelJions frm: tJne a~oil~tr. To make n~ thing ol rhe faults of thofe whom you Love, IS to Love them fooh!hly to theu hurt; and to !hew rhat it is nor for their vtriHtJ that you Love them. And to make too great & malitr of one ano.. rhers faulrs, is hut to help the Tcmprer to quench your love, and turn your hearts fror:n one. a~other. Thus many good women that have Husbands that are guilty of too much coldncfs m Rehg10n, Ot worldly-rmndedncfs, .or falling into ill company, and mifpending their time, are firfi apt to over· look all poffibility of any feed of grace that may be in them, and then looking on them as ungodly perfons, to abate too much their Love and duty to them. There is great wifdom and watchfulnefi rcqqifite in this cafe, to keep you from being carry~d into either of the exncams.
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