Baxter - BJ1441 B3 1673

'- [afes about parting H110band a11d Wife. prophane, heretical perfons, or Infidels , which is the deferter then ? Anfw. If !he be one that - t:ither like to do good to the Infidels, Hcreticks , or b:~d pcrfons whom they muft converfe wirh 5 !he may fuppofe that God callerh her to receive good by doing good: or if !he be a confirmed well: felled C:hrifiian, a.nd not very like, either by infc:ltion, or by want of helps, to be unfetled and mif~ carry-1 Jt feemeth to me the fafen wayto follow her Husband. She mufi lofe indeed Gods publick Ordmances b~ follo~mg h1m : But tt IS not Imputable to her,as being out ofher choice: and lhe muft lofe !be bcnehts, and neglect the duties of the Conjugal Qrdinance, if !he do not follow him. But tf (he be a pcrfo~ l\nder fuch weaknefTes, as make b.er remove apparently dangerous as ro her perfi:ve~ ranee and ~alvatlon,, ~nd her Hu~band will by no means be prevailed with to change his mind, the care then IS very difficult what IS her duty, and who is the defCitc:r? Nay, ifhe did but lead her in– to a~ountrey w.here her life were like to be taken away, (as under the Sp_anijh lnquifition ), unlefs her fu(fcrmg were like to be as ferviceable to Chrifi: as her life. Indeed thefe cafes are tO difficult, that 1 Wltl not decide them : The inconvenienc:ies, ( or mifchicfs rather ) are great which w;ay foever file take~: But I ~1ofi inolinc to judge as foll~weth; viz, It is confiderablc: firfi,wha.r Marriage obiigeth her to, funply of Its own nature; and what 1t may.do next,by any fuperadded Contract, or by the Law or Cufto,uc: of the Land, or any other accident. As to the firfi, it feemeth to me, that every ones obli– gation is fo much tirfi ro God, and then to their own fouls and lives; that marriage as fuch, which is fo~ Mum•l help, as a Means to higher Ends, doth not oblige her to forfake all the Communion of Sums, and the place or Countrey where God is lawfully wor!hipped, and to lofe all the helps of pub– lick Worlhip, and to expofe her foul both to fpiritual famine and infcd::ion, to the apparent hazard ofher f<lvarion (and perhaps bring her children into the fame mifery;) nor bath God given her Husband any power tO do her fa much wrong, nor is the Marriage-Covenant to be interpreted to in, tend ir. Bur what any humane Law or Conrrac5t, or other accident which is of greater p•blicl(_con– f~quence, may do more than Marriage of it felf, is a diftinct Cafe, which mufi have a particular difcuffion• .fk!rft. But wh11 if the Plusband would only have her follow.him, to the forfaking ofher efiate, and undoing her felf and children in the world ( as in the cafe ofGaleacius CaraccioiU< Marquefs ofVicum ;) yea, and if it were wichout jull caufe? Anfrv. If it be for greater fpirit~al gain (as in his cafe) !he is bound to follow him: But ifit be appa'rcntly fooli{h, to rheundoing ofher and her children without any caufe, I fee not that Marriage £imply obligeth aW.oman fo to follow a fool in beggary, or out of a Calling) or to her ruine : But ifir be·ar all a controverrible C1fe, whether the Caufe be jufi or nor, then the Husb;md being Go– vernour_muHbe Judge. The Law~oftheLand are fuppofed to be jufi, which allow a Woman by Truliees to fecurc fame part qf her former Ellate from her Husbands difpofal : Much more may !he before hand fecurc her felf and children from being ruined by his wilful folly : But !hecanby no Con• trad, except her felffrom his true Government. r. • Yetfiillfhc mo.fi confider, whethedhe can Jive contincntly in his abfence: otherwifethe griatefi fufferings mufi be endared, to avoid incontinency. 2· Moreover, in all thefe cafes; a~temporary removal may be further followed, than a perpetual ts:anf ... mi·gration, becaufc i~ )uth fewer evil confequ:ents. . ' And ifeither party renounce the Relation it felf, it is a fuller ikfertion, and clearer difcharge of the · Other party, than a meer remoyal is. 9<!!tJI· 1.6. ' ~·ft· r6. What if a Man or Wife know that the orher in hatred doth re•lly intend by payfon or other murder, to take away their life? May they not depart ? '4nfw. They '11'\Y not do it up9p a groundlefs or ra!h furmife; nor upon a danger which by other lawful means may be avpided (A? by Vigilancy, I" tne Magifirate,- or efpccially. by love and duty). But in plain dangq, wj1ich is no~ pthcrwife like to !:le avo1ded, I dou~t not, but It may be done _and, ought. For it is a duty ro preferve our own lives as wc:ll as our nctghbours : And when Marnage is conrncred for mutual help, it is naturally implyed, that they !hall have no power to depriveene another ofJife: (However fomc barbarous Nations have given men power of. the lives of (beir • I Wives'. ) Ana i(iUing Is the groffcfi kind ofDeferti•n, and a greater injury and violation ofthe Marri· age-Covenant than Adultery ; and ll)ay be ~reventej by avoiding the murderers prefence; 1f _!~at way be necdfary. None of the Ends of Man:iage <;;an be attairted , where the hatred IS fo great.·:. ; ... \ r. r . ~·ft· '7· ~eft· '7• If there be but a fix~d 6~tred ofeach ot~t, is it incenfifient with the Ends ofMarriage? · AncUs·pa.rting la~fful in fuch acafe > _ v · . _ Anfw. The in juring party is bound to Lovt and net. to [eparate: and can have no ltberty by hJS-" .., 1 . or her fin. And to fay, I eannqt ·lovt, Or my Wife or Hurband is 11t1t amiab.le, is no fufficient ~xcufe: : - Bc:oaufe every pcrfqQ bath fomewhat that is amiable; if it bebut hurr{ane nature: And that !hoiild have been forefccn before your choice. And as it is no excufe to a drunkard to fay, I cannot lea~e ~ my dr,inlo fa it is none to an adulterer or hater of another, to fay, I caonot love them : Fo~ that 1s but t.O fayl I am .fo wicked, that my heatt or will is againU my duty•. But the in~ocent parttes cafe is barclc~ ( thoyg~ commonly both parties are faulty, 'aod therefore both are obbged to return to Love, ~pd not to feparate. ) But if hatred proceed not to adulcery·, or murder, or m~oll_erable tn)UIIes, you mufi remember that Mauiage is not aContrafr for year~, but for life, and that 1t IS poflible that barred !Jlay be cured (how unlikely foever it may be ) : And therefore you mufi do yo.ur duty, and wait, and pray, and firive by Love and Goodnefs to recover Love, and then fiay tofee what God wtll dD: for miftak.es in yowr choice will not warrant a.feparation. •\

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