442 DIRECTIONS FOR GETTING AND KEEPING with Christ;" that is; he had rather, be in heaven than on earth, and therefore he is contented to submit to the penal sharp pas- sage. God doth not command you to desire death itself, nor for- bid you fearing it as an evil to nature, and a punishment of sin. Only he requireth you to desire the blessedness to be enjoyed, after death, and that so earnestly as may make death itself the easier to you. Thank God, if the fear of death be somewhat abated inyou, though it be not sweetened. Men may pretend what they please, but nature will abhor death as long as it is nature, and as long as man is man ; else temporal death had béen no punishment . to Adam, if his innocent nature had not abhorred it as it was an evil to it. Tell me but this, if death did not stand in your way to heaven, but that you could travel to heaven as easily as to London, would not you rather go thither, andbe with Christ, than stay in sin and vanity here on earth, so be it you were certain to be with Christ? Ifyou can say yea to this, then it is apparent that your loathness to die is either from the uncertainty of your salvation, or from the natural averseness to a dissolution, or both, and not from an unwillingness to be with Christ, or a preferring the vanities of this world before the blessedness of thatto come. Lastly, It may be God may lay that affliction on you, or use some other necessary means with you yet, before you die, that may make you more will- ing than now you are. Doubt 19. ' God layeth upon me such heavy afflictions, that I cannot believe he loves me. He writeth bitter things against me, and taketh me for his enemy. I.am afflicted inmy health, in my name, in my children, and nearest friends, and in my estate. I live incontinual poverty, or pinching distress of one kind or other; yea, my very soul is filled with his terrors, and night and day is his hand heavy upon me.' Answ. I have said enough to this before, nor doI think it need- ful to say any more, when the Holy Ghost bath said so much; but only to desire you to read what he bath written in Heb. xii. and Job throughout; and Psal xxxvii. lxxiii., and divers others. The next doubt is contrary. Doubt 20. I read in Scripture, that through many tribulations we must enter into heaven, and that all that will live godly in Christ Jesus, must suffer persecution ; and that he that taketh not up his cross, and so followeth Christ, cannotbe his disciple. And that if we are not corrected, we are bastards, and not sons. But I never had any affliction from God, but have lived in constant prosperity to this day. Christ saith, " Woe to you, when all men speak well of you." But all men, for aught I know, speak well of me; and therefore I doubt of my sincerity.' Answ. I would not have mentioned this doubt, but. that I was .._..
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