Baxter - Houston-Packer Collection BX5200 .B352 1835 v2

224 BAXTER'S DYING THOUGHTS. more suitable to our desires. O ! how great a number of my godly friends are there ! They are so many that I, cannot make a catalogue of their" names, but the memory of abundance of them Both tlelight me. And when we meet, there, we shall be far better known to each other than we were to the most intimate on earth. O, let Christians now so converse together as remembering that they must meet in, heaven, where all`that was secret will be brought to light. If we now put on any vizor, and seem better thanwe are ; if we hide any sin, br ..base corruption ; if we, by fraud or.falsehood, deceive our friends, all this will be opened when we meet in heaven. Itis a daily griefand shame to my soul, to think of the sins that T havé committed against some that are now in heaven, which I either excused; extenuated, or hid, and to thinkhow much evil they will know of me there, which onearth, they knew not by me. But God, who pardoneth them; will cause his servants there to forgive'each other ; but the detected sin, for all that; will be an odious, shameful thing. Lying and hypocrisy are there no cloak, but an aggravation, of the Shame. If we can- not confess, and take shame to ourselves, by repentance, upon earth, how shall we appear in the open light, and see the faces of those whom we havewronged? What diminution it will make of ourjoy, I know not, but it must needs be a dishonor to have been false to God, or man ; and especially when we meet where sin is perfectly hated, to think how Nye either sinned together, or that we tempted and ensnared one another in any sin. How it will affect us then I do not fully know; but it is now to me afar greater grief to think of any in heaven whom I have tempted of wronged, than it was while they lived with me on earth. And I think there is somewhat of this nature common to good and bad: even the consciences of wicked men do haunt them for notable injuries to others, especially concealedones, and especially for persecuting the servants of God, when they are dead, more than while they lived. Insomuclg that (though I doubt not of real apparitions) I am ready to think, *that some that say theyare haunted by the sight and the voice of such as seem to them.to be deceased per- sons, are rather haunted by their own consciences, which strongly represent those persons to their imaginations. But on the other side, it is a great delight to me to think of the good which I received from many that are now in heaven; of the profitable sermons which I have heard from some, and the profitable conversations which I have had with others ; how oft we sweetly consulted together ofthe things which concern everlasting life ; how many days, in public and private, we spent in prepara- tion, and in seme 1Srospect of the blessedness which now they en-

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