78 BAXTER'S DYING THOUGHTS. knowledge. Alas ! when our present knowledge bath cost a' man the studyofförty, or fifty, or sixty years, how. lean and poor, how doubtful and unsatisfactory is it, after all ! But when God will show us himself, and all things, and when heaven is known as the sun by its own light, this will . be the clear, sure, and satisfactory knowledge : " Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God ; Matt. v. "And without holiness none can see him ; " Heb. xii. 14. This sight will be worthy the nameof. wisdom, when, our present glimpse is but philosolihy, a love and desire of wisdom. So far should we be from fearing death,through the fear of losing our knowledge, or any of the means of knowledge, that it should make us rather long for the world of glorious light, that we might get out orthis darkness, and know all that with an easy look, to our joy and satisfaction, which here we know with trouble- some doubtings,or not atall. Shall we be afraid ofdarkness in the heavenly light, or of ignorance, when we see the,Lord of glory? And as for the loss of sermons, books, and other means, 'surely it is no loss to cease the means when we have attained the, end. Cannot we spare our winter clothes, as troublesome,. in- the heat of summer, and sit by the hot fire without our gloves ? Cannot we sit at home without a horse ora coach, or set them by at our journey's end.? Cannot we lie in bed without boots and spurs? Is it grievous to us to cease our physic when we are well Even here, he is happier that bath least of the creature, and needeth least, than hé that bath muchand needeth much ; because all crea- ture commodities and helps have also their discommodities and troublesomeness ; and the very applying and using so .many reme- dies of our want is tedious of itself; and as God only needeth nothing, but is self-sufficient, and therefore only perfectly and es- sentially happy, so those are likest God that need least fromwith- out, and have the greatest plenitude of internal goodness. What need we to preach, hear, read, pray, to bring us to heaven when we are there ? . And as for our friends, and our converse with them, as relations, or as wise, religious, and faithful to us, he that believeth not that there 'are far more, and far better, in heaven, than are on earth, doth not believe, as he ought, that there is a heaven. Our friends here are wise, but they are unwise also ; they are faithful, but partly unfaithful ; they are holy, but also, alas ! too sinful ; 'they have the image of God, but blotted and dishonored by their faults.; they do God and his church much service, but they also do too much against him, and too much for Satan, even when they intend the honor of God.; they promote ,the gospel, but they also hinder it their weakness, ignorance, error, selfishness, pride, pas- sion, division, contention, scandals, and remissness, do oft so much
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