Background Image
Table of Contents Table of Contents
Previous Page  168 / 846 Next Page
Information
Show Menu
Previous Page 168 / 846 Next Page
Page Background

The

LIFE

of

the

1L

B.

I

of

Eternity

are the principal

Caufes

of

this Effe& ;

which

fame have imputed to

Self-conceitednefs and Morofity.

3t. I

am more and more

pleafed

with

a folitary

Life ; and though

in

a

way

of

Selr:denial

I

could fubmit

to the molt publick

Life,

for the

fervice

of

God,

when

herequireth it, and

would

not

be unprofitable

that

I

might

be-

private

;

yet

I

mutt

confefs,

it

is

much more

pleating

to

my

felt,

to

be

retired from the World,

and to

have

very little

to

do with Men, and

to

converfe

with God and

Con1eience

and

good Books;

of

which

Ihave

fpoken

my Heart in

my Divine

Life,

Part III.

32.

Though

I

was

never muchtempted

to

the

Sin

of

Covetoufnefs,,

yet

my fear

of

dying

was

wont to tell me, that

I

was

not

Efficiently loofened from this

World. But

I

find

that

it

is

comparatively very

eafy

to me

to

be

bole

from

this

World, but

bard

to

live

by Faith

above.

To

defpife

Earth

is

eafy

to me

;

but not

foeafy

to

be acquainted and converfantin Heaven.

I

have

nothing in

this

World

which

I

could

not

eafily let

go

;

but to get

fàtisfying Apprehenfions

of

the other

World

is

the great and grievousDifficulty.

33.

I

am

much more apprehenfive than long ago,

of

the

Odioufneß

and

Danger

of

the

Sin

of Pride;

fcarce any

Sin

appeareth moreodious

to

toe

:

Having

daily

more

Ac uaintance with the lamentableNaughtinefs and Frailty

of

Man,

and

of

the

Milchiefs of

that

Sin

;

and

efpecially

in

Matters Spiritual and Ecclefiaflical:

I

think

fo

far

as

any

Man

is

proud he

is

kin

to

the Devil, and utterly a Stranger to

God

and to himfelf

:

It's a Wonder that it

Ihould

be

a

poffible

Sin, to

Men

that

Bill

carry about with them,

in

Soul

and Body,

fuch humbling

matter

of

Remedy

as

we

all do,

;4

I

more than ever lament the Unhappinefs

of

the Nobility, Gentry, and

great

ones

of

the World, who

live

in fuch Temptation to

Senfualiry, Curiofrty

and

waling

of

their time about a multitude

of

little things; and

whole Lives

are

too

often the

Tranfcript

of

the

Sins

of

Sodom

;

Pride,

fulnefs

of

Bread,

and

abun-

dance

of

Idlenefs,

and want

of

Compaffion

to

the Poor. And

I

more

value

the

Life

of

the poor LabouringMan ;

but

efpecially

of

him

that bath neither

Pover-

ty nor

Riches.

3y.

I

am much more

fenfible

than heretofore,

of

the Breadth, and Length, and

Depth

of

the radical, univerfal, odious Sin

of

SeIfbnefs,

and thereforehave writ-

ten

fo

much againft

it

:

And of the Excellency and

Necefíity

of

Self-denial,

and

of

a

publick

Mind,

and

of

loving

our Neighbour

as

our

felves.

36.

I

am moré and more

fenfible

that

moi

Controverfies have more need

of

right Staring

than

of

Debating

;

and

if

my

Skill

be increafed

in

any

thing it

is

in

that,

in

narrowing

Controverfies

by Explication, and feparating the

real

from

the

verbal, and proving to many

Contenders, that they

differ

des

than they think

they

do.

;7.

I

am more

folicitous

than

I

have been about my

Duty to God, and

lets

folicitous

about

his

Dealings

with

me;

as

being affured

that he

will do allthings

well

;

and

as

acknowledging the Goodnefi

of

all

the Declarations

of

his

Holynefs,

even in the Punifhment

of

Man

;

and

as

knowing

that there

is

no Reifbut in the

Will

and Goodnefs

of

God.

38.

Though my

Works were never fuch

as

could be any

Temptation

to me

to

dream

of

obliging

God

by

proper Merit, in commutative

Juffice ;

yet

one

of

the

moi

ready,

coolant,

.

undoubted Evidences

of

my Uprightnefs and

Interei

in

his

Covenant,

is

the Confcioufnefs

of

my

living

as devoted

to'

bim: And I the

Cali-

lier

believe

the Pardon

of

my

Failings

through my Redeemer, while

I

know

that

I

ferve

no other Matter, and that I know no other End, or Trade, or

Bufinefs

;

but that

I

am

imployed

in

his

Work, and

make

it the

Bufinefs

of

my Life, and

live

to

him in the

World,notwithianding my

Infirmities

:

And

this

Bent

and

Bufinefs

of

my Life, with my longing

Defsres

after Perfeetion, in the Knowledge andBe-

lief and Love

of God,

and

in

a

Holy and

Heavenly

Mind

and Life, are the

two

Banding,

coolant,

difcernable

Evidences-,

which molt put me out

of

doubt

of

my Sincerity

:

And I

find

that

conf

sear

ArÌion

and

Duty

is

it that

keepeth the

fief

always in

Sight

; and ronfiant

Wants

and

Weakneffes,

and coming

fhort

of

my

De-

fires,

do make thofe

Defer

Bill

the more

troublefom,

and

fo

the more

eafily

ßi11

per-

ceived.

39.

Though my

habitual

Judgment and

Refolution and Scope of Life be Bill

the

fame,

yet

I

find

a

great Mutability

as

to

a

&nal

Apprehenfions,

and Degrees

of Grace;

and confequently

find

that

fo mutable a

thing

as

the Mind of Man,

would never

keep its

fèlf

if

God

were

not

its

Keeper.

When I

have

been

ferioufly

niufing

upon the

R,eafons

of ÇluiitAnity,

with the concurrent

Evidences

metho-

dically