WHO LOSE THE SAINT'S REST. 89 my heart, when a faithful minister pressed home the truth ! O how fair was I once for heaven !' I almost had it, and yet I have lost it. Had I followed on to seek the Lord, I had now been blessed among the saints." 13. It will exceedingly torment them to remem ber their lost opportunities. " How many weeks, and months, and years, did I lose, which, if I had improved, I might now have been happy ! Wretch that I was ! could I find no time to study the work, for which I had all my time ! no time among all my labours to labour for eternity ! Had I time to eat, and drink, and sleep, and none to save my soul? had I time for mirth, and vain discourse, and none for prayer? could I take time to secure the world, and none to try my title to heaven ? O precious time ! I had once enough, and now I must have no more. I had once so much, I knew not what to do with it ; and now it is gone, and cannot be recalled. O that I had but one of those years to live over 'again ! how speedily would I repent ! how earnestly would I pray ! how diligently would I hear ! bow closely would I examine my state ! how strictly would I live ! But it is now too late, alas ! too late." § 14. It will add to their calamity to remember how often they were persuaded to return. « Fain would the minister have had me escape these torments. With what love and compassion did he beseech nie ! and yet I did but make a jest of it. How often did he convince me, and yet I stifled all these convictions. How did he open to me my very heart ; and yet I was loth to know the worst of myself. O how glad would he have been, if he could have seen me cor- dially turn to Christ ! My godly friends admonished me. They told me what would become of my wil- fulness and negligence at last: but I neither believed, nor regarded them. How long did God himself con- descend to entreat me ! How did the Spirit strive with my heart, as if he was loth to take a denial! 3
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