254 CONTEMPLATION [Chap. 16. his voice, received his benefits, and lived in his bosom. He taught thee to know thyself and him ; he opened thee that first window, through which thou sawest into heaven. Hast thou forgotten since thy heart was careless, and he awakened it ; hard, and he softened it ; stubborn, and he made it yield ; at peace, andhe troubled it ; whole, and he broke it; and broken, till he healed it again ? Hast thou forgotten the times when he found thee in tears ; when he heard thy se- cret sighs and groans, and left all to come and comfort thee ; when he took thee, as it were, in his arms, and asked thee, Poor soul, what ails thee ? Dost thou weep, when 1 have wept so much ? Be of good cheer ; thy wounds are saving, and not deadly ; it is I have made them, who mean thee no hurt ; though I let out thy blood, I will not let out thy life. I remember his voice. How gentlydid he take me up ! How carefully did he dress my wounds ! Methinks I hear him still saying to me, ' Poor sinner, though thou hast dealt unkindly with me, and cast me off, yet I will not do so by thee. Though thou hast set light by me, and all my mercies, yet they and myself are all thine. What wouldst thou have, that I can give thee ? And what dost thou want, that I can- not give thee ? If any thing I have will give thee pleasure, tz shalt have it. Wouldst thou have pardon? I freely forgive thee all the debt. Wouldst thou have grace and peace ? Thou shalt have them both. Wouldst thou have myself? Behold, I am thine, thy Friend, thy Lord, thy Brother, Husband, and Head. Wouldst thou have the Fa- ther ? I will bring thee to him, and thou shalt have him, in and by me.' These were my Lord's reviving words. After all, when I was doubtful of his love, methinks I yet remem- ber his overcoming arguments : ' Have I done so much, sinner, to testify my love, and yet dost thou doubt ? Have 1 offered thee myself and love so long, and yet dost thou question my willingness to be thine ? At what dearer rate should I tell thee that I love thee ? Wilt thou not believe my bitter passion proceeded from love ? Have I made my- self in the Gospel a lion to thine enemies, and a lamb to thee, and dost thou overlook my lamb-like nature ? Had I been willing to let thee perish, what need I have done and suffered so much? What need I follow thee with such pa- tience and importunity? Whydost thou tell meof thy wants; have I not enough for me and thee? or of thy unworthi-
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