258 CONTEMPLATION [Chap. 16. shout for joy ?' Why should I, then, be discouraged ? My God is willing, if I were but willing. He is delighted in my delights. He would have it myconstant frame, and daily business, to be near him in my believing meditations, and to live in the sweetest thoughts of his goodness. O blessed em- ployment, fit for the sons of God 1 But thy feast, my Lord, is nothing to me without an appetite. Thou hast set the dainties of heaven before me ; but, alas ! I am blind, and cannot see them ! I am sick, and cannot relish them ! I am so benumbed, that I cannot put forth a hand to take them ! I therefore humblybeg this grace, that, as thou hast opened heaven to me in thy word, so thou wouldst open mine eyes to see it, and my heart to delight in it ; else heaven will be no heaven to me. O thou Spirit of life, breathe upon thy graces in me ; take me by the hand, and lift me from the earth, that I may see what glory ' thou hast prepared for them that love thee !' "Away then, ye soul-tormenting cares and fears, ye heart- vexing sorrows ! At least forbear a little while : stand by ; stay here below, till I go up and see my rest. The way is strange to me, but not to Christ. There was the eternal abode of his glorious Deity; and thither hath he also brought his glorified flesh. It was his work to purchase it ; it is his to prepare it, and to prepare me for it, and bring me to it Theeternal God of truth hath given me his promise, his seal andoath,. that, bal-ioving-irk °Lariat, I rlall not poriali, buc everlasting life.' Thither shall my soul be speedily removed, and my body very shortly follow. And can my tongue say, that I shall shortly and surely live with God, and yet myheart not leap within me ? Can Isay it with faith, and not with joy ? Ah,faith, how sensibly do 'I now perceive thyweakness ! But though unbelief darken my light, and dull my life, and sup- press my joys, it shall not be able to conquer and destroy me ; though it envy all my comforts, yet some, in spite of it, I shall even here receive ; and if that did not hinder, what abundance might I have ! The light of heaven would shine into my heart, and I might be almost as familiar there as Iamon earth. Come away then, my soul ; stop thine ears to the ignorant language of infidelity ; thou art able to answer all its arguments ; or, if thou art not, yet tread them under thy feet. Come away; stand not locking on that grave, nor turning those bones, nor reading thy lesson now in the dust ;
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