126 MEMOIRS OF PERIOD V i í. God than-be-thy refuge," &c. And I could not but obferve the Lord's putting a flop to it till I was in.this cafe. June 13. 'Tliurfdav, I met with a [k'eref coke. On the li1on, day afternoon and 'f'uefday I Mal fallen fecure again ; had only foam awakening glifis, and fad experienceof the infta'biiity of my heart; which lay fo heavy on me on Tuefilav's night, that I would have been content to have quitted all, to have been out of the reach of a woful heart, and to havehad a dying-day inftead of a marriage-day. On Wednefday, it was once better ; but ere that day was gone, my vigour fpiritual was gone, This morning 1 had little freedom in prayer. I preached the weekly ferrnon with an overly iuperficial moving of at eótions. After the fermon 'a while, I went out to the garden, and there wás,a l'pit flicking in the wall of the houle, with the fu all end of it outtnoft. I rufhed inadvertently. my face on it, and the wound I got was about a draw- breadth beneath.the eye. I was ftupitiedwith it, and knew not but it had gone into the eye-ball It ('welled to a great biguels, and covered a great part of my .eye. ' I was of aid of loling my eye. It fent me to the Lord, confelling my fin, and taking with the puniihment of mine iniquity-; and I got a patient, quiet, fubmillïve, and contented frame under the rod, endeavotir- ing to trufi God come- what would. Greatrpercy it was that it was riot a draw- breadth higher ; for then it would havedigged out my eye. I endeavoured to fit loot& to my friend, and all created enjoyments, ìvinch I thought God called for ,by that rod. On the morrow the thoughts of my falling off Co frequently to pro- voke the Lord, and fo bringing one rod after another on my made heaven very delirable to me.: And noticing the way of Providence with nie, I kitied this rod, for there was a deal of kindnefs its it. . June 23. I preached at Eymouth, under great withdrawings of' the Spirit, as before narrated. This bufiuei's has been a fuare to me fince it came fo near a period. If I laid not guided better before, I could have had little comfort in it. God is my witnefs, that it has been and is my grief, that in my thoughts of it I can- not be more heavenly ; and that I cannot more vigoroufly look to God with refpeelt to it. If this day eight days, when I.am to be proclaimed, be fuch a day as this, I think I will be wounded with the arrows of-the. Almighty for that it; fhould be fo at this jun&ure is a dorible'.ntifery. June S. Wherefore -I pent force time this day in prayer, With rel'pecî to my marriage mainly ; was fiilidly afleeled with it, and helped to beli ve ; and have hitherto felt my fpirit bettEred thereby, keeping fornewhat more closely with God than before. Yeilerday I had a view of my need of Chrift, and the f ipplies of his grace ; and had much inward fatisfaotion flowing from the fenfe of my foul's nearnelá to God, and my heart's being kept in forte mealtime with Gad. And this day the thoughts of that bufinefs were,a fpur to duty.
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