iJS MEMOIRS. OF PERIOD IX. greater thoughts of it than I. There are two difficulties in the way of this condufion : Firft, The ftraitening I had in ftudying that termini ; but my experience leavesno weight in thisA,Second, My trouble as to the horfe beginning ere I 'went away. From what I have met with, t. I have learned, that if the Lord has a mind, hewill carry on his work, and no thanks to the inftruments; for I took that exercife in hand through a fort ofmere force. 2. To be denied to my credit in the Lord's matters. One of the minifters that preached that Saturday, never defiredme to do it; the otherof them did as good as forbid me, and I had no will to have it faid, that I loved to hear myfelf fpeak, or that the people would be weary, ,c. But now I fee that thefe things are but thin fig-leaves. Lord, my foul is asa weaned child. 3. I think I have thereby obtained fòme tbul-advantage ; more heavenlinefs in the frame of my heart, more contempt of the world, as the widow that is defolate trufteth in God. I have more confidence in God, to which I am helped (with refpeót to nay work in the parifh) particularly by that word, If. xxxiii. 10. " Now will I rife, faith the Lord, now will I he exalted, now will I lift up myfelf;" which was a feveet word to me, o1r the Taft Lord's day, in my leéture, which fell tobe in that chapter that day, in which I had more than ordinary of the Lord's light and life, though I had very little time to Rudy either it or the fermons. I have thereby obtained more carefulnefs to walk with God, and to get evidences for heaven; more refalution of fpirit for the Lord's work,, over the belly of difficulties. For there was more yet in thatafíli&ion. I have been much difcouraged with refpeét tomy párifh a long time, and havehad little hand or heart for mywork. I take God's dealing thus with me to be defigned as a mean to make me better content. . Now the Lord has driven the bufinefs to a great height of hopeieffñefs, by the removal of two of the molt comfortable of my elders, I may fay of three : Walter Bryden went out of the parifh at Whitfunday Taft; now this ftroke, in the removal by death of William Biggar; and Mr Faterfon, a wife, fweet-tetnpered young man, who by his authority was a bállaft in this place to my enemies, is goingaway againit Martinmas next. And I have but four elders behind. And, which is molt fad, fo rare is an inofFenfive walk among us, that it is extremely hard to get others in their room, who would not be a reproach to the office. I know not how much further the,Lord may carry it ; but I delire to take fpirits, and when all is gone to look to the Lord. .Twit Lord's day night I had fore thoughts as to evidences for heaven, which I returned this day. I. I am content to take thrift for my prophet, to be taught by himwhat is my duty, that I may comply with it I am content to know what is my fin, that I may turn from it ; and by grace l know fornething of what it is to make ufe of fihrift as a. prophet in this cafe ; and I delire to learn of him,, as thé only Matter, what is the will of God, and
RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy OTcyMjk=