202 MEMOIR! Or PERIOD $I, might have whom to preach to ; for it was a very bad day ; 2. An opportunity to preach without diftra6tion ; for my wife had fòrne pains ; 3. That the Lord would be with me ; for the pulpit without him was a terror. This day was an exceeding pleafànt day, and the people came well out. I had no trouble from my wife's cafe. Thefe things in the morning werera valley of Achór for a door of hope. I gave myfelf to prayer, and entered to the work in a tender Melted frame. I dare not fay, that the Lord was not with me ; but I had not what I would tain have had. I had feveral ups and downs in the fermons. I would fain have been at the mark, but the legs would not ferve. I found I loved the Lord, and would fain have been there where the executive power vilI fully anfwer the will. I know not what thé Lord has a mind to do with hue, but this good while I have had no ill time of it. 1. I have found frequent flutterings of my foul after the Lord. very. fenfibly. 2. I have found duty very pleafant, and ibmetimes a paint give it over 3. -I have found more freedom with God in ficret than in family duties,; for there I got leave to tell all I thought. 4. I have f«rnetimes a confufion in my head in preaching ; I prayed againft it particularly this day, I had fomething of it,' but it hafted not; though I was about four - hours in confiant exercife. But feldom does my body fail in preaching; when my frame is right. 5. I havé found the Lord eafy to be entreated, and a recovery to be got-without long onwaiting; As yefterday I was fomewhat carnal, I fought the Lord, but found him not : I went back again to God, and was fet right gain, And feldorn has it continued ill with rne, for !óm& time, tram the beginning to the end ofduty. 6. On Wednefday lafta form that threatened this parifh, already fore Aìtirefled, did -break: I found'ntyfelf concerned to get this mercy, both in public and private, and thankful to the Lord when- it was co-me and why may not I look on it, as theLord's hearing of my prayers, amongit thofe of others? Feb: 3. I had met with a temptation that put me out of frame. Afterwards I met with another of the fame kind, but fharper;' with which I went to God, and it hilted in quickening me again. I was turned off the thing that railed my corruptions, and turned in againfi: myfelf, that I could not get my will to comply; with the will ofGod in this, without fretting, and chearfully to fubwit to providence. in that particular. It was flinging to think, that whereas I have feveral evidences for-heaven, this one thing is like to blot them all out, I have found a fatisfaetion in feeing the Lord, by his providence, fet Me on my trials for my humiliation in other cafes ; lout I think I can never get over this. I wreftled with the Lórd to get my will melted down, that at length in this I might be as a weaned child. This cured me in another cafe,' and made me fear the being taken off my trials before forcegood: metal fhould appear. Laft night, while, this cafe lay heavy on
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