1 64. MR THOMAS BOSTON. s7 'willingnefs on account of the fmallnefs of their number : but, in oppofition thereto, a fear of my ignorance of the weight of the work of the minftry, feized me ; and it feemed to me I had not been enough humbled for my former levity, but that the Lord faw it neceffàry to humble me further for it ; and I got myheart contented, and found that the Lord " ftrengthened me with ftrength in my foul," to wait on him, and follow the conduót ofhis providence. Thereafter I meditated on the reft of ìy fer- mons. Having preached at Dunfe on the Sabbath, I gave myfelf on the Monday to fatting and prayer, to feek of the Lord a right way, in that matter now laid before me ; breaking over an averle- nefs I found to that exercife ungrateful to the flefh. Three things were,fuggefted to me, prompting me to be fo at pains f©r light in that matter ; thinking with myfelf thus. 1. Unlefs I be fine of my call to it from the Lord, how will I Rand againft the difcouragements I will meet with there ? 2. How can I think of profiting them, if he fend me not to them ? 3. How will I Rand with them before the tribunalof God, if I join with them without a call from himfelf? Having read Ezra ix.. & x. I went to prayer, to prepare my heart for the work ; thought awhile, and then went to prayer again, and poured out my foul before the Lord. Thereafter I read the written confellion of fin, which is above mentioned, and then made anadditional one, in writing too. Whichdone, I thought on my fins and heart- rnonfters, till my foul was more humbled in me. Then bowing my knees before the Lord, I read over the two confeffions afbrefaid ; poured out my foul before him, making a particular confeffion of my fins, fo far as I Could remember them arraigned and condemned my- felf, and looked to the Lord, in the promife, for mercy. After that, minding to renew the covenant with God, and fubfcribe,it with my hand, I drew it up in writing ; which done, I prayed, the Spirit blowing on me ; and I was greatly helped to refolute- nefs for Chrift, refolving, if I perifhed, I thould die at his door. Then I examined myfelf, as to my willingnefs to adhere unto it, and fubfcribe it, in all the parts thereof, feverally and diftinótly and having found myfelf willing, I poured out my foul before him in prayer; in which prayer, having fome fuch expreffion as this, ' O Lord, art thou willing !' that word came to me, " All " things are ready, come to the marriage :" to this Amen laid my foul. Rifing up, I wrote down there words in the paper I had drawn, and looking up to the Lord, I fubfcribed it with my hand. I wrote down there alfo, Jer. xxx. 22. Deut. xxxiii. 427. 2 Cor. xii. 9. That paper is in retentis ". After this, I meditated á while ; then L went to prayer for the benefits of the covenant, particularly for that which was the occafion of this day's exercife :,I cried for light, and was laid down at his feet; An exaót copyof it is annexed to the author's Body of Divinity,,printed in 1,773
RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy OTcyMjk=