MARGARET GODOLPIIIN, one day I fancy no life so pure as the unmarried, another day I think it less exemplary, and that the married life has more opportunity of exercising charity ; and then again, that it is full of solicitude and worldliness ; so as to what I shall do I know not." Self-accusingly did she bewail the stubborn- ness of her heart, which would not be subdued ; and she wrote in mournful language to her sym- pathizing friend Evelyn. " Inmuch affliction, and in great agony, was your poor friend this day, to think of the love of the holy Jesus, and yet be so little able to make Him any return. For with what fervour have I protested against all affections to the things of this world ; resigning them all, without excep- tion ; when, the first moment I am tried, I shrink away, and am passionately fond of the creature, and forgetful of the Creator. This, when I considered, I fell on my knees, and, with many tears, begged of God to assist me with His grace, and banish from me all concern but that of heavenly things, and wholly to possess my heart Himself, and either re- lieve me in this conflict, now so long sustained, or continue to me strength to resist it, still fearing, if the combat cease not in time, I should repine for being put upon so hard a duty. But then, again, when I call to mind the grace of self-denial, the honours of suffering for my Saviour, the reward proposed for those that conquer, the delights I shall conceive in seeing Him, the happiness of the life above, I that am thus feeble, thus fearful, call (out 30
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