248 APPENDIX. senses, money to pay my debts, power to build a convenient habitation, blessing to repair many ruins in the estate of my father, and to enjoy it peaceably. Gracious was my God in giving me my first wife, now I trust, a blessed saint, who was a'most affectionate, prudent, pious person, by whom God gave me, besides a very considerable portion, the mercy of four daugh- ters. Two sleep, I trust, in Jesus, and live with God. Two now survive, I hope, to glorifie God. Gracious was my God, in giving to me my present wife, who bath been made the dear comfort of my life now above twelve years, and the mother of four sons and a daughter, of which God was pleased to take my youngest son, in infancy, to His mercy. Blessed be. God ! that hath granted me favour in the affection of my father and my mother, who tenderly loved me, and wisely and carefully in- structed and corrected me. What am I, a poor worm, to have any esteem in the world, or to be accepted by thy saints ? O Lord ! by thy favour I was chosen of several parliaments; chosen, unknown to myself, Governor of Dunkirk, and there honoured to be serviceable to thy servants, and to assist the sanctification of thy holy sabbath. How pretious are all thy thoughts of love unto me, O God ! How great is the sum of them ! The visitation of thy Spirit, O Lord ! bath taught me the precious wonders of thy laws. From my birth, the lines have fallen unto me in pleasant places, for I have always heard the joyful sound of thy divine jubilee. Nay, Lord ! this place, which was greatly waste, and for divers years in the region of the shadow of death, for the sins and iniquities of my forefathers, who were idolators and sinners, and of me an unholy, vile wretch, now is made to me a goodly heritage ; for we have a place of worship and a faithful dispenser of the Word of God. Who is a God like unto our God, that pardons iniquity, transgression, and sin ? O Lord! for thy name's sake, heal my backslidings, love me freely, subdue all my iniquities, and cast all my sins into the depths of the sea. My life is but a vapour. Oh! in Jesus Christ beget me, by the incor- ruptible seed of thy word, which liveth and abideth for ever, that I may do the will of God and abide for ever. Oh, Lord ! I am the clay, be thou my potter. Fashion this house of clay to be thy temple. Make me a vessel of praise and service to thy Majesty. Be not ashamed to be my God ! there-
RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy OTcyMjk=