flateojft Chriflian. ;85 to me, andprayer is no bnrt~en ymo me, ~ut IA thefeargument~feen,etoprooue) without all my ordinarie exercife. _If.I r1fc m the morning waueting, doubting , and dillrulting ofGods I am not well till I haue prayed and giuen mercy? thankeste>God, ifl do anything, itcommeth Eufo,b. No,no. This my faith ~hich I haue : into my mind to pray. In my praiers I finde in Chrill i.euen fought aPtain!l with doubting, greatioy and comfort, and exceedmg fauour and euer alfailed with de pcration, not when ofGod, I neuer thinke I can well take my relt, I finne onely, butalfo in tentations of adueror doe any thing elfe-except firlt I aske it at fitie, intowhich Godbringethme to .nurture Gods hand in Chrilt. Laftly, when my·minde me and to lbew me mineowne heart,the hypoand heart is wholly occupied in worldly matcriGe arid falfethoughts that there lie hid ·, my ters, I amltirred vp, andas it were clrawne to almoltnofaithat all, and as little loue, eucn pray vnto God for the .remifsion of mY finnes, then happly when I thought my felfe moft and the all'uranceofmy &!nation, and in.praier perfea ofall : for when temptations come I I haLle had thofe grones which for thtir grea~- cannot ltand, when I haue finned faith is feenell'ecannot qe exprelfed. Now from whence ble, when wrong is done vnto mee I cannot commethall this?From the diuell?No.In thefe B forgiue,in fickneffe.,in lolfe ofgoods, in all tdaaions I haue found himmy enemie, & a •onbulation I am '<npafient, wheR my neighbour tin:uall hinderer of them. For hee by his craft , needeth my helpe that I mult depart with him when I hauebeene heauie and weake, hathafofmineowne, then loueis cold. And thus I &iled toproueke mee to fome linnes whereun· learne and feele that there is no power to doe to my curfed nature was malt giuen, and I hag'ood butofGod onely. And inall fuchtempui~yeelc!ed to him, haue beene fo har~ened tationsmy faith perilbeth notvtterly, neither an b!illdqiby thofe !innes, that for a nme l my Ioue and confent to the lawof God: but haue made l!£'t account of the~Yard of God they beweake,!icke, wounded,and notcleane and praie~~: ,ell rhe_n, perad~1enture this came dead.As I dealt with my parents being a child, from min~ i:!W9e f.;lte: no neither: Th1s curfed fa now deale I towards God my louiog Fanature of mine hath beene more pleafed and ther. Whenlwasachild, !llyfather andmodelightedwiti'i_finne, and with'1he pleafilfesof ther taught me nurture and wifedome, I loued the world,then with fuch exercifes from which my father and all his commandemel)ts, and itdraweth me-and prell'eth me downe as lead.! perceiued the goodne!fe he !hewed mee, .that cannotthinkthatfvc;l\ apoifoning Cockatrice my farher loued me, and all his precepts are can lay li1ch goodegs, or thatwildcrab-trees vnto my wealth and profit, and thatmy father (fuch as all men are in A(i4m) can bring foorrh c commandeth nothing for ''"Y needc hee hath fweerefruites, according tothewillof God, thcreof,but feeketh my profit oncly,and thereexceptGodplucke them forth of Adam, and fore I haue agood fait~ vmu ~11 my tarhm plant them in the garden of his mercy , and promites, an loue all his cbmmandemems ll:ockethem, and graft the fpiritof Chrift in and doe them with a go\IP will., and wit!; them. Wherefore thefe are the works ofGods good will goe eueey day to the fchoole: And fpirir, and my confcience is thereby certified, by the way happly I faw a companie plav that GJd hath giuen mee the fpirir of adoptiand with thefight was taken and rauilbed of on, and therefore that his fJuaur and mercie my memorie, and 'forgat my felfe, and !toad : !ball continue towardsmee f<>reuer. 'For the and beheld,and feU to playal~o, f<>rgottiag fa- - gifts ofGod are without repentance, & whom ther and fnother, and alJ their kindnelfe, all God once louerh , him bee loueth for eaer. theirlawes,af,dmineowneprofit al(o, How. Thirdly, there be certaine fruits of Godschilbeit the know edge ofmy fathers kindnes the drenwhich I find i11mebywhichiamconfirfaith ofhispromifes, and theloue that ihad med in Gods fauour, S. John in his firltEpiiHe againevnto my father, and the obedient mind faith,thathereby we know that we are tranfi•- D were not vtterly quenched, but lay hidden ted from death to life, becaLlfe wee loue the as alJ things doe when a ma11 fieepeth r brethren. Truely,Ifeele inmyheart a burning or lyeth in a trance. And as foone as I loue towards them which are good .Chrifti. had played out all my lults, or elfe by fome ans,thoughi neuerknewthemnor fawthem, had beene warned inthe meane feafon, I came and I am very defirous to doe any good for againe ro my aide profefsion. Notwiththem : and if drops of my heart blood would ftanding many tentations went ouer my de them good;they lbould hauc them. Moreheart, a•d the la>': as a right hang-man ouer I hate all.finne and wickednelfe with a tormented my confctence, and went f.l ioh bitter hatred, ·and I long to fee the comming to pedivade mee that my father wot~d ofmy Sauiou~Chrift toiudgement, I am griethruf! me away, and hang mee if hee catche<l, ued aud difqUJe,ed, becaufe I cannot fulfil! the me,fo that I was like a great while tO'run away _lawofGod1s Iought,all which I haue learned rather then to returne to my fath~r againe. forth of GJds word to bee tokens of Gods Feare and dread of rebuke, and of lofle of children. Add you fee what euidence I haue to my fat~ers loue, and of punilhment, wrafhewthat I am a true member of the Church ll:led With the trult which I had in my familit·lnt,and in the fauour ofGod. thers goodnelfe, and as it were ganc my faith Tlm. _H•ue you aftedfa!l: faith in Chrift, (as afall. But! rofe againe as foone as the rage Kk 4 of
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