MISCELLANEOUS TIiOUGIiTS. 383 Well, though my natural courage-run very low, yet I hate these characters which have been now described, and abominate the principles whence they proceed. I confess, a feeble man and diffident, had need to pray daily, Lord, lead us not into temptation : But if ever I should be called to bear witness to the truth, and to do public honour to religion and virtue, at the expenceof all my mortal interests,' I trust the God of nature and grace to furnish me with every necessary talent, and to up- hold me with divine fortitude. And O may I never dare to do a base or unworthy action, to the injury of my friend or my country, or to the unjust detriment of the meanest figure among mankind, in order to save life itself, or to acquire the richest advantages that can belong to it ? XLVII.Sckness and Recovery. IT was the custom of David, as appears by several of -his psalms, and it was the practice of Hezekiah and Jonah, kings and prophets, to rehearse the agonies of their distress, when they offered to heaven their songs of deliverance. They recol- lected their hours and days of bitterness, and the workings of their soul amidst their sharp and grievous sorrows, to make the remembrance of their salvation the sweeter, and so kindle the zeal of their gratitude to a higher flame. Is it a matter of blame to imitate such examples ? Doth not the reason hold good in our age, and to all generations ? Why should a christian be any more afraid to tell the world of his afflictions or distresses than a Jew ? Or why should he be ashamed to let them know, that amidst those sinkings of life and nature, christianity and the gospel were his support ? Amidst all the violence of my distemper, and the tiresome months of it, I thank God I -never lost sight of reason or religion, though sometimes I had much ado to preserve the machine of animal nature in such order as regularly to exercise either the man or the christian, especially when I shut my eyes to seek sleep and repose, and had not their aid to fence against the disorderly ferments of natural spirits. But these conflicts are described in the following lines. Blessed be God for preserving and healing mercy ! Thoughts and Meditations in a long Sickness. 1712 and 1713. The Hurry of the Spirits, in a Fever and Nervous Disorders. MY frame of- nature is a ruffled sea, And my disease the tempest. Nature feels A strange commotion to her inmost centre; The throne of reason shakes. Be still my thoughts ; ' Peace and be still.' In vain my reason gives The peaceful word, my spirit strives in vain To calm the tumult and command my thoughts. This flesh, this circling blood, these brutal powers Made to obey, turn rebels to the mind, Nor hear its laws. The engine rules the roan.
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