and SAVIOUR, JESUS CHRIST, and his APOSTLES, &c. 299 You are ignorant then of what a feared imagination can figure, what a guilty heart can feel! Hòwdifmal is it ! The two great enemies of foul and body, ficknefs and fin, fink and confound his friends ; thence and darknefs the {hocking fcene : ficknefs ex- cludes the light ofheaven, and fin it's blef- fed hope. Oh, double darknefs ! more than Egyptian ! acutely to be felt ! " ° The fad evening before the death of that noble youth, whofe laft hours fug- gelled thefe thoughts, I was with him. No one was there but his phyfician, and an intimate acquaintance whom he loved, and whom he had ruined. At my coming he faid, " You and the phyfician are come °` too late. I have neither life nor hope. " You both aim at miracles. You would " raife the dead." " Heaven, I faid, was merciful." " Or I could not have been thus guilty. " What has it not done to biefs, and to " fave me ? I have been too flrong for °` Omnipotence : I plucked down ruin." t< I faid, the bleffed Redeemer. " ° Hold ! Hold ! you wound me ! That " is the rock on which I have fplit! I de- " nied his name." °` Refuting to hear any thing from me, or take any thing from the phyfician, he lay filent, as far as fudden darts of pain would permit, till the clock flruck ; then he cried out with vehemence, " Oh time ! °` time ! It is fit thou fhouldit thus flrike °` thy murderer to the heart. How art " thou fled for ever ? A month ! Oh, " for a fingle week ! I afk not for years, " though an age were too little for the " much I have to do." " On my faying we could not do too much ; that heaven was a bleflèd place. " Somuch theworfe. 'Tis loft ! 'Tis loft ! " Heaven is to me the fevereftpart of hell!" " ° Soon after, I propofed prayer. " Pray, " you that can : I never prayed : I cannot " pray. Nor need I. Heaven is on my " fide already : it doles with my confcience, " it's fevereft flrokes but fecond my own." " His friend being much touched, even " to tears at this (for who could forbear? I could not) he with a moil affeEionate " ° look, laid, " Keep thefe tears for thy- " ° felf. I have undone thee. Doft thou " weep for me ? That's cruel. What can °` pain me more ?" " Here his friend, too much affeét.ed, would have left him. No, flay. Thou hill may'fl hope ; " therefore hear me. How madly have I " talked ? How madly haft, thou liftened " and believed? But look on my prefent " hate as a full anfwer to thee and to my- " felf. This body is all weaknefs and " pain ; but my foul, as if flung up by torment, to greater flrength and fpirit, " is full powerful to reafon ; full mighty " to fuffer. ' And that which thus triumphs " within the jaws of mortality, is doubt- " lefs immortal. And as for a Deity, no- t thing lefs than an Almighty could inflift " the pains I feel." I was about to congratulate this paf- five, involuntary confeffion, in his aflèrting the two prime articles ofhis creed, extort- ed by the rack of nature : when he thus very paflìonately added, " No, no ! let " ° me fpeak on. I have not long to fpeak. " My much injured friend ! my foul, " as my body, lies in ruins, in fcattered " ° fragments of broken thought : remorfe " ° for the paft throw's my thoughts on the " future : worfe dread of the future ftrikes " it back on the pall. I turn, and turn, " and find no ray. Didit thou feel half " the mountain that is on me, thou wouldit " ftruggle with the martyr for his flake, and biefs heaven for the flames ; that " is not an everlafting flame ; that is not " an unquenchable fire." " ° Howwere we ftruelt ? Yet, foon after, hill more. With what an eye of diftract.ion, what a face of defpair he cried out, " My " principles have poifoned my friend ; my " extravagance has beggared my boy ; my " .unkindnefs has murdered my wife!And " is there another hell ? Oh! thou blaf- " phemed, yet molt indulgent Lord God! `° Hell itfelf is a refuge if it hides me from " ° thy frown."-- - " Soon
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