Baxter - BX5207 B3 A2 1696

The LIFE of the 1L B. I of Eternity are the principal Caufes of this Effe& ; which fame have imputed to Self-conceitednefs and Morofity. 3t. I am more and more pleafed with a folitary Life ; and though in a way of Selr:denial I could fubmit to the molt publickLife, for the fervice of God, when herequireth it, and would not be unprofitable that I might be-private ; yet I mutt confefs, it is much more pleating to my felt, to be retired from the World, and to have very little to do with Men, and to converfewith God and Con1eience and good Books; of which Ihave fpokenmy Heart in my DivineLife, Part III. 32. Though I was never muchtempted to the Sin of Covetoufnefs,, yet my fear of dying was wont to tell me, that I was not Efficiently loofened from this World. But I find that it is comparatively very eafy to me to be bole from this World, but bard to live by Faith above. To defpife Earth is eafy to me ; but not foeafy to be acquainted and converfantin Heaven. I have nothing in thisWorld which I could not eafily let go ; but to get fàtisfying Apprehenfions of the other World is the great and grievousDifficulty. 33. I am much more apprehenfive than long ago, of the Odioufneßand Danger of the Sinof Pride; fcarce any Sin appeareth moreodiousto toe : Having daily more Ac uaintance with the lamentableNaughtinefs and Frailty of Man, and of the Milchiefs of that Sin ; and efpecially in Matters Spiritual and Ecclefiaflical: I think fo far as any Man is proud he is kin to the Devil, and utterly a Stranger to Godand to himfelf : It's a Wonder that it Ihould bea poffible Sin, to Men that Bill carry about with them, in Soul and Body, fuch humbling matter of Remedy as we all do, ;4 I more than ever lament the Unhappinefs of the Nobility, Gentry, and great ones of the World, who live in fuch Temptation to Senfualiry, Curiofrty and waling of their time about a multitude of little things; and whole Lives are too often the Tranfcript of the Sins of Sodom ; Pride, fulnefs of Bread, and abun- dance of Idlenefs, and want of Compaffion to the Poor. And I more value the Life of the poor LabouringMan ; but efpecially of him that bath neither Pover- ty nor Riches. 3y. I am much more fenfible than heretofore, of the Breadth, and Length, and Depthof the radical, univerfal, odious Sin of SeIfbnefs, and thereforehave writ- ten fo much againft it : And of the Excellency andNecefíity of Self-denial, and of a publick Mind, and of loving our Neighbour as our felves. 36. I am moré and more fenfible that moi Controverfies have more need of right Staring than of Debating; and if my Skill be increafed in any thing it is in that, in narrowing Controverfies by Explication, and feparating the real from the verbal, and proving to many Contenders, that they differ des than they think they do. ;7. I am more folicitous than I have been about my Duty to God, and lets folicitous about his Dealings with me; as being affured that he will do allthings well ; and as acknowledging the Goodnefi of all the Declarationsof his Holynefs, even in the Punifhment of Man ; and as knowing that there is no Reifbut in the Will and Goodnefs of God. 38. Though my Works were never fuch as could be any Temptation to me to dream ofobliging God by proper Merit, in commutative Juffice ; yet one of the moi ready, coolant, . undoubted Evidencesof my Uprightnefs and Interei in his Covenant, is the Confcioufnefsof my living as devoted to' bim: And I the Cali- lier believe the Pardonof my Failings through my Redeemer, while I know that I ferve no other Matter, and that I know no other End, or Trade, or Bufinefs ; but that I am imployed in his Work, and make it theBufinefs of my Life, and live to him in the World,notwithianding my Infirmities : And this Bent and Bufinefs of my Life, with my longing Defsres after Perfeetion, in the Knowledge andBe- lief and Love of God, and in a Holy andHeavenly Mind and Life, are the two Banding, coolant, difcernable Evidences-, which molt put me out of doubt of my Sincerity : And I find that conf sear ArÌion and Duty is it that keepeth the fief always inSight ; and ronfiantWants and Weakneffes, and coming fhort of my De- fires, do make thofe Defer Bill the more troublefom, and fo the more eafily ßi11per- ceived. 39. Though my habitual Judgment and Refolution and Scope of Life be Bill the fame, yet I find a great Mutability as to a&nal Apprehenfions, and Degrees of Grace; and confequently find that fo mutable a thing as the Mind of Man, would never keep its fèlf if God werenot its Keeper. When I havebeen ferioufly niufing upon the R,eafons of ÇluiitAnity, with the concurrentEvidences metho- dically