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76
Grace abounding
have
infJerited
the bleffing, he
f~und ,
no place of
Repentance, though he fought zt carefully with
tears.\\lherefore
I could not
return,but fled
tho' at
fome'times it
cried,Return., return,as
if
it
did hollow after tne: But I feared too clofe
in
therewith, left
it
!hould not come
from
God ; for that other,
BS
I faid,
\Vas
frill
founding in
n1y
Confcience)
For
you
know how
that
~t_(ter;wards,
when he would have
-inherited
the blejfing, he
11>as
rejeEled.
&c.
.
173.
Once.as I was
walking
to
and
fro
in
a
good man's Q.lop,
bemoani~1g
.of
my fclf
in
my
fad and
do1eful tftate,
affhthng
my
felf with
felf-abhorrence for this wicked and
ungodly
Thought,
lamenting
alfo
this hard
hap of
tnine, for that I fhonld co1nn1it
fo
great
a fin,
greatly fearing 1 01ould not he
pardoned,
}Jrayin
g
alfo in
n1y
heart, that
if
this fin
of
mine did differ
fron1
that againfl: the Holy
Ghofr, the Lord 'would fuew
it
tne.
And being
:now ready to
~nk
with
fear,
_ fudd(~Jy
there
\~las,
a :.
if
there had rgfhed
in ·at
the
Window,
theNoife
ofWind upon
rne,but!very
,pleafant,
at:d
as
if I
had heard a voice
fpeaking,
Didft
evrr refufe to be
juflified
hy.
the JJlor;d
of
Chrip?
and withal,
n1y
whole life and profefl1on paft,
\¥as
in a tnotnent opened
to
n1e,whc~ein
I was
made to
fee, that
defign,edly
I had
not:
So
my
H;:-a rt anfwered
groaningly,
No.
~fhen
fell
\vith Povver
that
VVord
of
God upon me,
Sec
that
~ye
ref11fe
not him that _{peaketh,
Heb.12.25.
1"'11is
n1ade
a !trange
feifure-upon
n1y
Spirit,
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